“If there is no me, there is no him.”

The above quote teaches us something very important about relationships.  That is, if we don’t know who we are, we have no starting point for being able to really know someone else.

Think about it – it’s true.  If you say to someone ‘I love you’, but you have only a very vague idea of who “I” is, than who is the “I”, and if you don’t know who the “I” is, how can you have a relationship with another?  (What’s love anyway? That’s a topic we’ll address in the near future).   In fact how can you have any type of conversation with anyone, including yourself, that begins with “I” (as in ‘I love you, I want to, etc.)?  The short, I don’t know how sweet, but true answer is, you can’t!  Or at least if you did, you’d have to recognize that it can’t be a genuine interaction.  In order to have a genuine interaction with other people you have to first be in a genuine interaction with yourself.

Most of us don’t have a connection with our true selves and I’ll tell you why.

My 18 month old daughter has a relatively real connection with herself.  The reason is that the left side of her brain has not yet begun to develop, although according to nature it soon will.  The reason this enables her to have a more genuine connection with herself and others is that the left side of the brain is responsible for storytelling with words, and since that ability has not fully developed within her, she is still sticking to nature’s script for who she is.  She knows herself to be that way and so do the others in her life.  No one would doubt it.

Stay tuned for next week when I’ll talk about nature’s script for who we are and what happens to it as we develop!

“If there is no me, there is no him.”

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