Hello Friends and Goodbye to 2018!

At the end of each year I like to take agood honest look at myself to see what has worked well for me and to see whathas not. I do this to create a better and happier life for myself, and I recommend this as something that you should try too. A self assessment of the good, the bad, and the ugly is a great way to figure out where you are emotionally; and to discover where you need to go in order to create a happier, and a more fulfilling life for yourself.

Here are some questions for you to ponder:

What have I done to maximize my psychological well-being?

What have I done to improve my self-esteem?

What has held me back in terms of my personal relationships?

How emotionally vulnerable have I allowed myself to be within my personal relationships?

In which ways have I succeeded in trying new things outside of my comfort zone?

These are just a few of many questions that you can ask yourself. Of course there are many more, the possibilities are endless. Ask yourself the questions, write down your responses, and periodically check them throughout the year to see how well you are doing, andin which areas you can improve on.

The focus on this blog moving forward will be to focus in on subjects that are of interest to you. I will write about love, sex, relationships, and most importantly – about the subjects that intrigue you the most. In order to do that though, I need your help! Pleaseemail me at jennifer.barkin@gmail.com with topics that you wish to see addressed here.

I wish you all the best for a Happy and healthy New Year. May you all find the love that you desire and deserve.



Awaiting the Spring

Gazing out across the lakes frozen tundra, I can count so many varying shades of grey.

I begin to find sublime humor and awesomeness in each varying shade.

The clock says spring, but I am feeling cold and unmoved by this. I observe the trees, standing solemnly with the weight of ice on its limbs, each passing wind, another branch torn asunder I huddle in front of my fire, my new pup cuddled close as I reflect on pollination, rebirth and spring. It seems far away. Actually like from another planet far!

I draw from my bank of memories and extract a springtime memory. Something as simple as walking home from school 7 th grade, everything melting, the sun on my face. It was feeling of connection to life, to the earth, with her blooming fragrant essences.

Today without the fragrance essences I am learning to embrace and welcome what ever joy I can extract from life, in the grey. This I discovered is key to bliss Gratitude even in the greys, the blues, whatever state that pulls you away from your higher self,

The honey bee, buzzing and flying from flower to flower pollinating and creating is in her state of essence and bliss. Precious ones, I suggest we all do the same. We are here for such a undeniably short time, embrace and find love everywhere.

Gratitude is the best attitude.

We are a nation victorious as we celebrate Purim this week, history shows we held ourselves together beautifully, acted righteously and celebration followed. Esther is our symbol of beauty and humility, uniting the people through her strength and dignity.

Remember, you don’t have to wait for the seasons to change or to find a new “love” it exists in all of us at all times.

Happy Spring, Happy Purim !

Single? Unattached? Celebrating Valentine’s Day? Yes, You Are.

I am my own Valentine

It’s coming. Again. And every year, there are people who look forward to Valentine’s Day, and some who don’t. It’s nice if you have a special someone to share the day or evening with, and for some, not so nice if you don’t. This year, if you’re someone special who doesn’t have a special someone to share the day with, don’t fret. I’m here to tell you, you do.

Yes, you do. YOU!  Let’s face it, we get so caught up in the have to’s, the must do’s, and the should’s, that we cause and create much stress and anxiety for ourselves, all the while trying to find the balance in the rat race of work, life and finding love. But you’ve forgotten one thing, one very important thing. Yourself. How can you love someone, and how can someone love you, when you’ve forgotten to love yourself?

Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be the pressure-cooker of dates and finding love that the media and marketers have cooked it up to be. This year, if you find yourself flying solo, embrace it. Sometimes things are the way they are, for you. Sometimes, in unwanted situations, there’s a gift, and here, on this day, the gift may just be the gift of being able to give to yourself. You love yourself, right? You deserve some personal TLC from none other, than yours truly…YOU.

No victims here. Enjoy the day. Make it an event. You’re incredible. Special. A very important person. Give to yourself. Treat yourself. This can be your special day. Get together with friends. See a movie, grab a bite, or stay in and get cozy with your favourite meal and a great movie. We never seem to get enough “me -time” anyway. Have fun, enjoy, but also spend some quiet time with yourself, to think, reflect, re-group, and re-evaluate. Growth and clarity often comes when we spend that quiet and meaningful time with ourselves, and this is my wish for you. You are empowered to think any way you choose, and to live any way you choose. Live it well, and enjoy YOU! Happy Valentine’s Day You!


Lauren xo

www.laurenmillman.com    Tel: 416-576-5881



How Closed Is Your Box?


Adam and Eve had it good. Adam was lucky because he didn’t have to search far and wide. Eve was lucky because for Adam, she was a the right place at the right time, and she didn’t have to search far and wide either. Times have changed though, and meeting other eligibles isn’t so easy, but it can be a matter of being in the right place at the right time.

Thursday night date night, either with that special someone, or even your girls or guys, your group. You’ve decided to go to one of your favourite spots, because the last time, you had a great time. You love the place, and the people are great. And, you’re single, and you’ve always got one eye on the scenery, just-in-case, right? Sure. I remember those days. I had this one friend, and whenever we went out, she’d always be thinking, in the back of her mind who might she meet tonight. I know this because I remember her telling me. She didn’t want to meet strangers per se, but would be curious about who she may recognize and strike a connection with, or who might one of our friends bring along that’s “new.” That never happened. And if it did, that person really wasn’t “new”, they just hadn’t been out with us for a long time and chances were, she interested in them in the first place, so nothing ever happened for her when we did go out. Does this sound familiar?

As human beings, this is what we do. We’re great adherers of the “herd” mentality. We travel in groups and tend to repeat the same behaviours and go to the same place, and do the same things. Why? Because it’s what we learn to come to know. It’s familiar and comfortable. But when we’re single and “looking”, or ready to meet someone, going to the same places with the same people, time after time, only produces the same result; not much of anything. You end up having a nice time, but you’re not meeting anyone new. You just end up going to the same place with the same crowd.

Yes, the more the merrier, but in going to same places all the time, you may find that although you’re having a nice time, it’s the same old, same old. Time to step outside of the box, and think new, think different. Your hit rate here is about, oh, 100%. Go somewhere new. Go with people you don’t usually go out with. You’re guaranteed to at least see new people, if not meet new people. Stepping out of what’s comfortable not only exposes you to new, but exposes everyone else to new too, and, it builds character and confidence.  It’s win-win.

Change is difficult for most of us. But once tried, you may see that stepping out of your box brings new experiences, new people, and a new outlook too!

Lauren XO